Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say?
- Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
- Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Really? Ya think?
- Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far!
- Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
- Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!
- Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
- War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
- If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
- Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
- Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!
- Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?
- New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren't they fat enough?!
- Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That's what he gets for eating those beans!
- Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
- Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!
- Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
And the winner is....
- Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead