Did I read that sign right?
Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.

In a laundromat:
Automatic washing machines: please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.

In a London department store:
Bargain basement upstairs.

In an office:
Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken.

In an office:
After tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.

Outside a second hand shop:
We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines, etc. why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?

Notice in health food shop window:
Cosed due to illness.

Spotted in a safari park: (I sure hope so)
Elephants, please stay in your car

Seen during a conference:
For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care on the 1st floor.

Notice in a farmer's field:
The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.

Message on a leaflet:
If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.

On a repair shop door:
We can repair anything. (please knock hard on the door - the bell doesn't work)

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